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My mate from the depot is marrying a girl from the Talas Alatau side. The toi is up there in October and her family got us the paper from the clan council.

I've been to Nurzhan weddings: banquet hall, vodka, somebody's uncle fights somebody's cousin in the car park, done. What do I need to know so I don't embarrass the entire city?

Do not ride in the kyz kuu.

why

You will lose. To a girl. In front of six hundred people. They will make a song about it.

Practical things. Gift in white or bright colours, never black, black is Morkhan's colour and the old ladies will notice even if they say nothing. No jokes about the kalym. Stand up when the bride arrives on the white horse. When the groom's mother puts the white elechek on her, that is the moment. Put your phone away for that.

Also. They will kill a sheep. It is for the food, not an offering, do not make a face. Do not mention horsemeat, not even as a joke. A guest was asked to leave a toi in my valley for that once. (He was from Talas.)

And you will see no cattle. They put the cattle out of sight for a wedding. If you see a cow, say nothing. It is somebody's mistake and he already knows.

And eat everything they put in front of you. Everything. Pace yourself, there is a third course you don't know about. Then a fourth.

Bring an appetite and a strong liver. At my cousin's toi in Kara-Buura I said "no más" and they thought it was a toast. Three more toasts.

Ruslan, do NOT tell them about the shoe and the tram wire.

that story is my best material

That is why.

Back. Report:

- The crowning was in a big white yurt, a priest, rings, a cup of wine, crowns of flowers. Very quiet. I was not ready for how quiet. My mate cried. I will deny this.
- I did not ride in the kyz kuu. I was asked. I said bad knee. An eight-year-old asked me which knee. I said the Nurzhan one.
- Lena was right about the fourth course. There was a fifth.
- Free-for-all ulak on the last day. I watched from behind a truck, which is where a city man belongs.
- The bride's grandmother asked if Nurzhan people still say Kobozev. I said some do. She said "good, names should be remembered". Kobozev_Kid, your grandmother has an ally in the mountains.
- Did not mention the shoe.

My grandmother will want her address. Proud of you about the shoe.

Thank you for the report. Only one question. Was the bride happy?

She asked ME if I was happy, then laughed at me. They met at a bus stop in Talas, two years of letters before anyone's family heard. She chose him. Everybody at the toi knew that story by heart.

Good. That's the only answer I wanted.